Thinking Congregations
  • Home
  • Blog
  • Coaching
  • Events
  • About
  • Contact
  • Home
  • Blog
  • Coaching
  • Events
  • About
  • Contact

Polarization: What happened to the continuum?

5/7/2017

0 Comments

 
Picture
Image: https://www.flickr.com/photos/furiousgeorge81/9513765
The ideas presented in this blog are taking from a new training module that is available to congregations and community stakeholders who are interested in addressing polarization in their communities.  If you’d like more information about the training, contact John Bell at john@thinkingcongregations.com.
 
 
Polarization takes a toll on communities and creates additional problems for institutions.  Compromise, collaboration, and cooperation are replaced with confrontation, obstinacy, and resistance.  Each side escalates their rhetoric and behavior towards the opposition.  Police departments, governments, not-for-profits, and religious institutions may become the target of controversy as they provide routine services to their constituents.  Community leaders may feel hopeless and stuck when working with a fearful public.
 
What opportunities are available to community leaders at such a time as this?  How can organizations and institutions develop policies and procedures that better address polarization?  What are ways to address the challenge without perpetuating the problem?
 
 
What is polarization?
 
“Polarization is the alignment of individuals moving in opposition to each other” (Dr. Dan Papero).  It can only be understood correctly as a relationship phenomenon.  It includes behaviors on each side to control the thinking, feeling, and actions of people on the other side.  At the same time, each side avoids opportunities to engage the challenges they face with the other side.  Those who attempt to have a nuanced and complex view of the issue are pressured to pick a side.  Polarization is an automatic, reactive way to address an increase in tension.   
 
 
The importance of understanding the triangle
 
Dr. Murray Bowen observed the natural occurrence of triangles in relationship systems, particularly the family.  A two-person relationship is not steady.  As anxiety rises in the relationship, it is natural for a third person to be drawn in to stabilize the relationship. 
 
Through the triangle, we can observe our natural tendencies to move towards others, what Bowen called the force for togetherness, or avoid others, which can result from too much togetherness.  Two people form a close connection, and a third person is in the uncomfortable outside position.  In a state of calm, the outside person will make an effort to push out one of the two insiders.  However, when tension increases, one of the two insiders will either form a new twosome with the other outside person or move to the outside position leaving the other two together.
 
When someone is forced into the outside position during times of heightened anxiety, that person will seek out someone else to form a new twosome.  This is the foundation of polarization, two pairs now in opposition to each other.  If the intensity between the original twosome is great, these interlocking triangles will spread quickly into larger groups.  Before long, people will herd into polarized groups.
 
 
The importance of Differentiation of Self
 
When two people or two parties have become polarized, it is possible for a third, emotionally neutral person to enter the relationship system and reduce the polarization.  If one person is able to relate to both individuals or groups in a mature, responsible way, there is a good chance the conflict will end.  This is part of what Dr. Bowen called Differentiation of Self.  Here is an example of what can go into this effort:

  1. Pay attention and observe your own level of anxiety as you relate to important people in your life.
  2. Work at intentionally reducing your anxiety through things like breathing, walking, etc.
  3. Pay attention to how important people in your life raise your level of anxiety and how you raise their level of anxiety.
  4. Learn the difference between your feelings and your thinking.
  5. Develop ways to think about and then communicate important issues without a long-term disruption of the relationship system.
  6. Repeat the process.
0 Comments



Leave a Reply.

    Author

    John Bell is the thinker behind Thinking Congregations.  As a thought partner he believes the best way forward is for leaders to do their best thinking.

    Subscribe!
    Click here to receive the blog by email. 

    Archives

    February 2020
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016

    Categories

    All
    Beliefs
    Change
    Chronic Anxiety
    Community
    Conflict
    Death
    Differentiation
    Emotional System
    Fear
    Individuality
    Leader
    Meeting
    Motivation
    Multigenerational Transmission Process
    Observing
    Over Functioning
    Process
    Projection
    Regression
    Togetherness
    Training
    Transition
    Triangle
    Under Functioning
    United Methodist
    Vision

    RSS Feed

Services

Blog
Coaching
Events


Company

About
Contact
© COPYRIGHT 2015. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.